Good Week/Bad Week: Grumpy Pumpy

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NSYNC they ain’t, but K-PB’s got some chords on him, no? via dirtytackle.

You lot have been so moody this week! First, your response to Christine Bleakley’s new fitness DVD can only be described as ‘mixed’, then you disturbed us by referring to Andre Villas Boas as a ‘ginger stallion‘, before taking serious exception to Revista Cuore’s assertion that The Ramos™ is ugly.

Luckily, we managed to curry favour with photographs of Fernando Llorente playing a clarinet, but it was touch-and-go there for a moment.

We hope our review of the week doesn’t upset you. We fear certain aspects of it might…

GOOD WEEK

Blimey, it’s been a while since we’ve seen him this happy on a football pitch. Image: REUTERS/Eddie Keogh.

Singalonga Boateng: It’s not often that we’re able to post a video of a player singing in the Good Week section. But Kevin-Prince Boateng, Robinho, Alexandre Pato and Thiago Silva made a fairly decent fist of their rendition of the ‘Happy Birthday’ song for TV station Al Jazeera. Considerably better than we manage in the office anyway. No one should be put through that.

Ice Ice Baby: If the Portland Timbers aren’t very careful, they’re going to force us to breach our stringent code of impartiality. Having recently shown up at Portland Fashion Week for a bit of hot roving, they’ve now only gone and invented their own ice-cream. Suffice to say, it involves maple syrup, blueberries and pancakes and we now feel seriously compromised. Maybe they should send us some, so we can feel bloated too.

Edge Of The Seat Stuff: Speculation is rife that our freckled friend Fernando Torres *might* be on Twitter. To date, the rumours state that @Torres is an official account set up for him by Chelsea FC but it has not yet been confirmed by club or player. He was welcomed to the site by Sports Illustrated journo @GrantWahl, who then tempered his earlier enthusiasm with this. As far as we know, the jury is still out, but let us know if you’ve heard different, Kickettes!

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BAD WEEK

Yeah, cheers. Thanks for that. Image: AP Photo/Nelson Antoine.

Playas Gonna Play: We advise that you should probably put down your unofficial mid-morning snack cake for this one. Done? OK. Chubby Ronaldo has waded into the ‘should footballers be allowed to have sex the night before a match‘ debate (er…yes, but only if it’s with us. Duh!) by claiming it’s actually more detrimental to a player’s performance if he engages in a bit of ‘self-lovin’ before a game. Well. There’s an insight, team.

Slash n’ Earn: Drama, petulance and claims of defamation are part of the daily grind at Kickette Towers, which is probably why we’re totally over the whole Carlos Tevez vs. Roberto Mancini saga. Today’s installment, in case any of you do care, is that the PFA have forced City to cut Tevez’ fine for ‘refusing to play’ from four weeks wages to two. That’s a discount of about half a million pounds.

Yup. We Lost: Let’s get this over with quickly, shall we? Despite your best efforts and our lack of organisation, we didn’t win a Cosmo Blog Award. But at least we noticed. Meanwhile, voting ends TODAY for the Shape Blog Awards, so if our general ineptitude hasn’t completely put you off, you can vote for us here. We’re all grinning at you in a winning manner…

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Thank you, Kickettes. You’re awesome.