MLS Update: Breaking Geographical Boundaries

Amobi Okugo of the Philadelphia Union. Toned, isn’t he? Otto Greule Jr/Getty Images North America.
The United States of America is not in Europe. We now know this because when we delivered last week’s international break story as a solid excuse for not writing up the MLS results this week, we got shot down. Apparently the USMNT game vs. Honduras last week was not a Euro 2012 qualifier.
Who knew?!
So here’s a brief rundown of what took place in the MLS over the weekend. You can read it while we try to figure out how to work this Google Maps thing.
Seattle Sounders 0-2 Philadelphia Union

Like seriously, stop bitching at each other and deal with the ball, dammit. No wonder you guys lost. Image: AP Photo/Ted S. Warren.
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New England Revolution 1-2 San Jose Earthquakes

There aren’t many things that make our lives worthwhile. But Benny Feilhaber’s booty is one of them. Image: Jim Rogash/Getty Images North America.
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It should be noted that from this moment forward, any attempt to attempt to stand on, kick or otherwise molest (unless for nefarious purposes, obvs) the short-tent is an offence punishable by three weeks in these shoes. Agreed, Chris Wingert? Image: Kim Stallknecht/Getty Images North America.
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Blimey. Turns out, the USA is a different continent to Europe. This geography business is quite an eye-opener, isn’t it?
